Supernatural Recap – Heaven Can’t Wait

The latest episode of Supernatural contains a case of the week, an update on the whole angels falling to earth thing, and a check in with what Castiel has been up to lately.  In other words, there’s a LOT going on in the Supernatural world, which is quite an accomplishment in any show’s 9th season.  I really love this show.

Castiel Update/Case of the Week

Castiel is learning to be human on his own, working in a convenience store since Dean kicked him out of their Men of Letters Bunker, and going by the name Steve now.  Good strong name.  Castiel’s boss totally wants Castiel’s nuts.  Either that or she just REALLY likes his initiative.  All I’m saying is if your boss repeatedly tells you that you’re special and they’re not being sarcastic, they may be hitting on you.  There are just more professional ways of showing appreciation than saying things that are traditionally pickup lines such as, “Where have you been all my life?”

supernatural castiel's boss

“You’re special” + this look = flirty flirty

My suspicions are confirmed after she asks him out even after the obvious signs that he’s living at the store.  Being a single mom must make her REALLY desperate – Cas is hot and all, but “possibly homeless” should be a clear flashing warning sign.

In case of the week news, people are dying in a mysterious way so Cas calls Dean to let him know that he might want to check it out.

Dean gets to the victim’s house that we saw in the opening scene and the guy’s place looks like it was spray painted by Barbie.  Oh ew turns out it’s blood, skin, nails, clothing fibers, etc.  As if he were “run through the world’s finest woodchipper”.  Thanks local cop for that imagery.

Now it’s time for the obvious second victim to be killed – poor girl is sad because she got dumped in front of everyone instead of “on Facebook like a normal person”.  Oh, kids today.  In my day, getting dumped in person was the only acceptable way.  And now she gets the Barbie poof treatment too from the same guy that poofed the first possibly suicidal victim.  Apparently the killer has a thing for putting people out of their misery.

Dean goes to see Cas at his convenience store and finds that Cas is very proud of being a sales associate.  VERY proud.  I say good for him.  He’s not too good to do some hard work.  I mean I guess it’s not that hard.  It’s not like he’s digging holes in the Phoenix heat during summer or anything.  But he could get held up at gunpoint at any time, hence the undesirability of working at a convenience store.

Anyway Dean convinces Cas to check out the scene of the second crime with him.  Dean talks to the friend of the dead girl to get an idea of her mental state earlier that day and I love the girl’s friend explaining the definition of “kinda bummed” to Dean.  More bummed than when she got a C on a test, less bummed than when her parents split up.  Kinda bummed.  Duh.  And then a little head move she does just slays me.

supernatural recap heaven can't wait

The look that totally says, “How dumb are you? Kinda bummed is kinda bummed. Idiot.”

It turns out that bringing Cas along was super helpful, as he has seen this type of killing aftermath before, in heaven.  In the battlefields of heaven there was a special angel with some name I won’t even try to spell that meant Hands of Mercy.  They would put the wounded beyond help out of their misery.  Now that this angel of mercy is on Earth, he doesn’t understand the ebb and flow of human emotion, so pain is pain to him.  He’s just putting anyone who’s a wee bit down out of their misery, not understanding the whole “humans bounce back” thing.  Dean is going to track down the angel and put him down and encourages Cas to go on his date.  But Cas needs a ride first.

They get to the boss’s house and Dean gives Cas a crash course in date prep which is super cute.  I think Cas needs more help, but hey, he’s gotten this far on just his looks and work ethic.  He pulls out a really suave move by grabbing a rose by the door but when he gets inside he finds that his date is actually a babysitting gig for the boss’s kid.  Oh man how sad – to think you’re going on a date when she was really asking him to babysit her kid so she could go out with some other guy.  Well, that really is taking advantage of your employee.  Super not cool.  Also this whole misunderstanding is absolutely on her because at no point did I hear her say the words “babysit” or “watch my baby” or any other indication of what she was actually asking “Steve” to do.

Unfortunately for Cas, the baby seems to have a fever and doesn’t feel well, which in this episode means the angel of mercy is gonna show up.  He does, but it turns out he came for Cas, not the baby.  TWIST!  Apparently being human is really unpleasant for Cas, which is understandable.  Who would want to give up all that cool angel power to be a regular human?  Lame!  Cas tries to reason with the guy but this angel of mercy doesn’t care and wants to rid the entire world of suffering.  That’s going to take a WHILE.

Of course, he’s not going to get the chance, because Dean comes in and saves the day.

Sam, Kevin, and Crowley – Angels on earth update 

Meanwhile at the beginning of the episode, Sam, Kevin, and Dean are going through Metatron’s notes (every time I hear that name I think about Transformers – it’s very distracting) which are written in cuneiform aka doodles, if you’re Dean.  Dean’s worst nightmare is researching doodles so when the opportunity comes up to bail, he absolutely takes it.  Cas calls him with a potential case and he books it out of there.

supernatural cuneiform doodles

Yep, looks like doodles to me too

With little luck interpreting Metatron’s notes about the kicking angels out of heaven thing, they decide to ask Crowley for help.  After all, they’re not keeping him trapped in the Bunker for the one-liners.  Although that should be part of it, because he can be darn funny. I just love how Crowley always calls Sam “Moose”.  Moose tries to get Crowley to cooperate by poking at his competitive edge, telling him that Abaddon is scarier than Crowley has been in years, but that doesn’t quite work on Crowley.

It does, however, give him an idea of what he can get in exchange for his help.  He tells them he wants to make a call to Abaddon and then he’ll interpret Metatron’s writings for them.  Kevin quite wisely wonders, “What if he’s lying?”  However, when it comes to Crowley, you ALWAYS have to assume he’s lying and has some ulterior motive.  He became the King of Hell for a reason.

Reasonable thought doesn’t stop Kevin and Moose, so they make the deal with Crowley and let him “make a call” to Abaddon which involves a bowl of Kevin’s blood.  Then he hilariously gets placed on hold by the bowl of blood.  Primitive calling system.

When he gets through, Abaddon informs him that she is voiding Crowley’s contracts and taking all the souls before their time.  She hates Crowley’s bureaucratic approach to hell and is determined to do things her way.  He makes some threats but she’s not worried since no one has seen him in weeks and he’s most likely been turned into a “kennel dog” by the Winchesters.  Then she asks him how he likes being their bitch.  Yikes, that’s gotta sting.

supernatural crowley bitch face

This is his “I hate being called their bitch” face

He is displeased at the end of their call but keeps his word and interprets Metatron’s doodles.  According to Crowley, they say that the spell that cast the angels out of heaven cannot be undone.  Angels roaming the earth and causing havoc is the new normal.

Later Sam notices that the plunger thing Kevin used to make the bowl of blood is gone.  He gets to Crowley just in time to spy on him apparently injecting some leftover Kevin blood into his veins.  When Sam was doing the last trial to close the gates of hell, trying to turn Crowley human again, he was injecting him with his own human blood.  So it seems that Crowley actually wants to complete the process…?  Maybe?  At least that’s what Sam probably thinks – that Crowley actually wants to be human, wants forgiveness for everything he has done.  He believes this because Sam is a soft-hearted doofus.

My theory is that maybe Crowley does want to complete the process and be human so that the demon traps he’s in won’t work anymore, then he can escape, then somehow become a demon again.  See, that would be a good plan.  I suspect that when Crowley’s humanity was allegedly returning during the third trial, he was faking his sadness.  Who’s to say that Crowley with humanity is any better than Crowley the demon?  Maybe he was always a sociopathic dick.  Something to think about.

The episode ends with Cas telling Dean he feels like he should be helping to figure out how to get the angels back to heaven.  Dean chooses not to tell him it’s irreversible and instead tells him that he’s human now, and it’s not his problem anymore.  The scene closes with Cas going through his opening the store routine, with a very Veronica Mars melancholy-noir feel that leaves me thinking that Cas is not going to be able to just move on with his life and ignore the whole angel situation.

Until next time…

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